Location: Cheshire, Connecticut, United States

devilishly handsome, screamingly funny, overly modest

Wednesday, August 30, 2006

Highway Bitch

Hah, gotcha. You thought this was going to be an expose on some piece of strange riding extramaritably on the back of my brother's bike. No -so sorry to disappoint- but this is just a bit of bitching on my part about my favorite peave : non-signalling a--holes who cut me off at ultra-high velocity, usually while exiting a highway.

This morning, as I was cruising up 91 at about 75 mph- in the exit-only right turn lane- this arrogant SOB in a yellow BMW cut across 2 lanes WITHOUT SIGNALLING, missing my front fender by 2 hairs on his pompous ass, and took the exit. Now I don't give a rat's posterior that he was speeding 'cause so was I, as well as 85% of the morning traffic on 91, but for God's sake let me know what the f--k you're doing. COMMUNICATE! 80 mph is a bad time to assume that I can read your mind.

I've told people I know at the State Police barracks that lane changes and high speed highway exiting without signalling is at least as dangerous as speeding, but while conceding the obvious correctness of my position (all my positions are by definition correct) they never enforce this law. I checked with the clerk of the Hartford Court and was told that as long as she could remember there had never been a ticket issued for that infraction.

On Rte. 9, a highway with at least 2 lanes in each direction, police started enforcing the law against passing on the right even if the person in the left lane is going 30 mph. They passed out 185 tickets in 2 days for this, over 900 in the following 30 days. Imagine the lives saved on that boondoggle. ( Needless to say, I was one of the lucky receivers of that particular miscarraige of the American Way- worse, I was on my way to my accountant to calculate my income tax). I've also been tagged for doing 30 in a 25 zone- this is excusable because it was the end of the month and the cop hadn't filled his quota yet. But guys going 85 and driving as if the word "signal" was Swahili for "never" apparently are made out of teflon.

And girls, don't think you're off this hook. It seems that 80% of women under the age of 30 are required to drive the smallest, brightest colored sports cars they can find at break-neck speed and to treat the highway like a theme park bumper car ride. Ladies, I know you can make your ideas known- I've seen you be VERY clear in communicating at the local pub- so why in hell can't you push that little signal lever in your car? It's easy, just pucker up and... oops, that's another scenario.

So am I right or am I right? No you can't answer (c) other. One of these days I'm gonna rent a Hummer with a snow plow attachment and clean up all those arrogant, non-signalling BMWs, Jags, Lexi, and free-wheeling sweet young things and make a huge metal pile right there on the side of 91. Love that road rage! Yaaaah!



Anonymous blue girl said...

I have to admit, I am quite a road rebel. But I do signal. I agree with you -- there is no excuse for not flipping that lever. Takes two seconds, not even. Takes one second.

6:12 AM  
Anonymous buildingblockhead said...

Bill, you are right on the blinker thing. However,,,im sure you did something to piss this fella off about 5 miles back, and he was just catching up to you as you slowed to 75 ;)

Were you ever able to give him a verbal lashing captain caveman style? I know how you like to drive hard and cuss (1st hand) :) I am the same way these days. Seems folks are just overmedicated (be it self or prescribed) or very passive aggresive. It can be fun at times, especially if they think your crazy.

1:14 AM  
Blogger coturnix said...

Bill, do you have a Sitemeter or some other method of checking your blog traffic?

8:28 PM  

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